Ghostbusters (2016) SPOILER Review

So, it's Tuesday, and I'm assuming that anyone who wanted to see the movie has seen it by now (and yet, Sony still thinks that $46 million is enough to say "YES! SEQUELS! SEEEEEQUELS!"), so today, I'm going to dive into a much needed discussion of spoilers. If you haven't seen the film and you don't want to be spoiled, check out my spoiler-free review from last week. This blog will be similar to my Money Monster review where I break down the film scene-by-scene and discuss certain aspects that I felt I was too vague on in my first review. This might end up sounding like a negative review, but just bear in mind I did overall enjoy the film; it has its funny moments, as well as a few elements that improve on the original, but essentially, it is the little things that did prevent it from being great, and that's what we're looking at today. So, with that said, let's take a look!



The film starts off with the tour of an old home, where the tour guide tells the group about a woman who was locked up in the basement until death and that her spirit is still haunting the house, after which a candle falls off of a table by itself, but since it's not glowing in neon colors, we know it's just a trick. Later that night, we see that the same guide is closing up when a locked basement door starts rumbling at him, so he runs into another room and throws a chair.... for some reason.... and finds that the chair floats in midair, so he runs into the now open basement... FOR SOME REASON..... and finds that the door slams behind him. He then spots some glowing green goo in said basement, which causes the wooden stairs to crumble and fades into the opening credits.

So, why did I go into so much detail there? Because it brings up the biggest problem with this movie, and something that plagues this first third; every guy in this movie is either an idiot or an asshole. Why did he run into a basement where he knew someone died when there's clearly a ghost among them? Also, as far as I'm concerned, the only reason he threw that chair was so the filmmakers could have a visual cue that there was a ghost! This doesn't even bare comparison to the original film, where the librarian was just carrying on with her job like normal, and THEN she came across the apparition. This is just plot manipulation for the sake of plot progress, and it pisses me off!

Anyway, after that and a rather cheap looking title screen, we cut to Erin, played by Kristen Wiig, who's answering a student's question that we never heard the student ask, so we know she's not really teaching a class just ye--- OH, SHE'S JUST PRACTICING FOR HER CLASS! Oh, you had me fooled there, movie! Anyway, she gets a visit from a man named Ed Mulgrave, who tells her about the haunting at the toured house and asks her to check it out. Why does he approach her about this? Because she wrote and published a book about paranormal activity... Or did she? It turns out it was published by her co-writer and previous partner in paranormal investigation, Abby, played by Melissa McCarthy, who she then goes to confront about publishing it behind her back, especially since she's up for tenure at her university.

Now, this I do actually find an interesting twist on the story. In the original, Bill Murray's false belief in the paranormal was a source of his snarky behavior. He pretended to believe in ghosts and spirits in order to tease people as well as score some hotties. Here, Erin legitimately did see ghosts when she was younger, which we'll get to later, but now that she's grown up, she's pushed aside that belief and wants to take her life seriously, which makes it all the more exciting when she actually does see a ghost. So, rather than the comedy coming from the central character and the serious crutch being held by supporting characters, Erin, the central character, is the serious crutch while the supporting characters deliver a lot of the comedy.

This is where Kate McKinnon comes in as Jillian Holtzmann, an engineer who, due to Erin's departure, has agreed to help Abby with her investigations, building all kinds of devices for tracking down ghosts and spewing out all kinds of techno-babble that even Spock would give a confused look to (as I discussed in my other review). Erin tells them about what Mulgrave told them, and Abby agrees that, if she helps them out with this case, she'll consider taking the book down from Amazon. When they do get to the house, however, they do indeed spot a ghost coming out of the basement, which is that first blue ghost we saw in the first trailer. Abby is recording the moment on her camcorder, Erin attempts to communicate with the ghost, only to get puked on, and Holtzmann is eating Pringles. Why? Because she can't resist its salty goodness. No, seriously, she says that up-front.


That's another big problem I have with the movie; the product placement here is ridiculous. It's one thing if you want to slip random products seamlessly into your average, everyday plot, but a lot of times, the characters will just announce the products up front. Say what you will about Man of Steel in how a fight takes place in an IHOP or how Zod's throwing a U-Haul truck; inserts like that might be distracting for some, but they don't hit pause on the plot. In here, when the characters have to announce their products, it just slows things down!

Anyway, after Erin gets some slime vomited on her by the ghost, she admits on camera that GHOSTS ARE REAL, and this video ends up going onto Youtube, which causes her to not only lose her chances at tenure, but also her job. They try to take this up to another, less credible university, but it's ran by a guy, so, as we already know, he's an asshole, but then, they get the idea to steal all of the university's equipment in order to go into business. And we're supposed to side with these women. In the original, the team had to deal with smug assholes as well, but they at least started up their business in an honest, albeit perhaps not realistic, manner of pulling out 2nd mortgages. Here, they just run off with someone else's expensive property and use that to set up their business. Truly noble heroes, aren't they? We also see them try to set up housing for their business, and, just like in the original, they take a look at the firehouse and find it to be perfect. Then we get what I have to admit is probably my favorite joke in the whole movie.

Seriously, SOMEBODY MAKE THIS A MEME!

So, that obviously doesn't work out, but they have a cheap alternative: the penthouse above a Chinese restaurant! Here, they're approached by Kevin, played by Chris Hemsworth, who applies to be their secretary. This is easily the funniest character in the movie, as well as probably the freshest next to Holtzmann; he's terribly idiotic, covering his eyes when he doesn't want to hear something, saying he can't answer the phone because it's in a fish tank, but he's so confident in his idiotic thoughts that no one can really tell him he's obviously wrong about something.

They also get a visit from an MTA employee named Patty, played by Leslie Jones, who tells them about how she's seen a ghost in the subways of Boston... I MEAN, NEW YORK.... So, the team goes down to take a look with their heavy, wheeled-around equipment to find that there is indeed a glowing, pixelated ghost prisoner in the subway (already talked about the effects in my first review, so won't waste time here). They try to catch it, but get sidetracked (no pun intended) by a train coming towards them and have to rush out of the way, letting the ghost escape. They then talk to a crazy guy in the subway to see if he could be a key witness to the ghost, but instead, he decides to be an asshole to them and draw a graffiti cartoon ghost on the subway wall. When the team makes it clear that they don't want his help, he decides to draw a red cross-out symbol over the ghost. Holtzmann takes a picture of this to use this as their business logo.

Okay, I'll make this one pretty short.... DID WE REALLY NEED AN EXPLANATION OF THE LOGO?!

Anyway, Patty decides to join the team, as she feels like she could apply her knowledge of navigating New York to the team, and she manages to borrow a car from her uncle, which results in that one scene we've all seen from the online clips.

One thing I find a little strange about this scene is that, in the trailer, Leslie Jones' response to McCarthy's remark about the car being a hearse is that "It's a Cadillac!", but in the movie, they slip in a line involving Enterprise Rent-a-Car. It just goes to show that product placements are so easily interchangeable. Can you imagine what other lines they could have slipped in if someone else's sponsor dropped out?

"I'm sorry, my uncle owns a funeral home, not a Chrysler dealer!"

"I'm sorry, my uncle owns a funeral home, not a Rich and Famous Limousine!"

"I'm sorry, my 2015 Honda Accord had bugs in it cause I left my tasty Burger King fries in it, so we're calling Terminix to clear them out! You should give them a call sometime, they're real nice!"

Hell, she's even talking about how making sure there was gas in the hearse was more important than checking to see if there was a body in it. Why not say something like....

"I was in a hurry! I had to make sure there was gas in it. That was more important!"

"Was there?"

"No, but thankfully, there was a Shell gas station right around the corner."

Go big or go home, sisters! Or better yet, just make a better movie!

So, on top of having a new car, Holtzmann manages to design them some new proton packs that will make catching the ghosts a whole lot more convenient for them. I said that in one simple sentence, but she feels the need to throw out more techno-babble. These, along with a bunch of other neat gadgets, get built just in time for the team to receive a call from the Stonebrook theater, which Kevin says "There's a goat on the loose." So, they go out in their newly redesigned car.... THAT WAS QUICK.... and head off to the theater to deal with the problem. This is where things start to pick up a little, as the team investigates the theater, Holtzmann cleverly steals a gag from Young Frankenstein, as you saw in the trailer, and Patty encounters a living manikin, which, as I said in my first review, is one of the better effects in the movie. They zap this manikin to find a CG ghost dragon fly out of it. They try zapping this ghost, but it flies around quickly, causing a lot of those obnoxious "COMING ATCHA" effects I mentioned in my first review. They follow this ghost over to a concert going on, and... well, skipping over what you've seen in the first trailer (I DON'T CARE WHAT ANYBODY SAYS, THAT SELFIE STICK JOKE WAS HILARIOUS!), they manage to capture the ghost in a ghost trap.

So, after the day is saved, they all celebrate with their first pizza dinner. It's here that we learn Erin's backstory in which she saw a ghost as a little girl, that Abby was the only person that ever believed her, and that they've been investigating ghosts ever since. Now, compared to the comedic, not the least bit dramatic figures we had in the first movie, this is actually a pretty interesting direction for this character to take. The only problem is that this is literally the only connection that Erin and Abby have as characters. Don't get me wrong; Kristen Wiig and Melissa McCarthy work well off of each other on a comedic level, as they have in several other movies, but I feel like Paul Feig just put these two together for that reason alone and forgot to write their characters with chemistry. In fact, out of the four, Abby is the least interesting as well as the least funny. I have to keep reminding myself she's even in the movie!

After this, the team gets a visit from a scientist named Martin Heiss, who wants to prove that their work is a hoax and wishes to see the ghost, telling them to open the trap in which the ghost is stored. And who's playing this obvious stand-in for Walter Peck?

Okay, this is so illogical, it's making my brain hurt..... Why not just have the Joker in the next Batman movie played by Michael Keaton?

Anyway, Erin opens the ghost trap for Dr. Heiss, as the ghost swoops out, throws him out the window, and flies away. After the police come to look over the wreck, the mayor and his assistant chat with these new Ghostbusters, as everyone's calling them now, and tell them to do their work undercover, reason being that they don't want panic among New York for all the trouble going on. So yes, just like in every other blockbuster about a threat against New York (aside from superhero movies, oddly enough), the government is trying to cover up these events.

Two major problems I have with this: One, unless you have a flashy stick that erases people's memories, that's NEVER going to happen. Second, why would you want to cover this up? In most superhero movies, the villain is always trying to cause a worldwide catastrophe, the people are aware of it, and the hero him/herself is the symbol of hope that always saves the day. Why can't the Ghostbusters be that symbol too? My best guess in this case is that the mayor is trying to make himself look better, and not like "the mayor from Jaws." (Meh, that joke was kind of a lame Seth McFarland-type moment for me.)

Anyway, after going through this, the team discovers a pattern in the ghost sightings and finds that the locations of every ghost sighting form an X towards one hotel where Annie Potts is working... Yeah, that's actually pretty funny...and they find out that one of the workers, Rowan, has been building a device that would release ghosts among the city and essentially cause an apocalypse. Why? Because he's been picked on all his life. No, seriously, that's his motivation. Once Abby mentions that the police are on their way, Rowan electrocutes himself and dies. The police come in, and the mayor has them arrested to continue with the cover-up. Later on, Erin finds out that Rowan actually killed himself as part of his plan, but she finds it out too late, as Rowan possesses Abby, as we saw in the trailer, but Patty slaps the ghost out of her while her necklace dangles outside of the movie screen's border (one rant over cheesy 3D effects is enough, thank you), and the ghost instead possesses Kevin, as he rides his motorcycle back to the hotel where he reactivates the machine and opens a portal where ghosts start escaping.

So, the team gears up and rolls out towards the center of this "fourth cataclysm" only to have Slimer steal their car. They prep up to shoot the car, but Holtzmann advises against that, as there's a nuclear reactor on top of the car. They're then encountered by a bunch of possessed parade balloons, which they start zapping and popping, but they get smushed by a Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man balloon and stay smushed until Erin pops it with her swiss army knife with grand "epic return" music playing upon her arrival.

Yeah, something Moviebob mentioned in his review that, in hindsight, confuses me too: Was there some kind of tragic departure plot line cut out from the movie? Where was Erin all this time? Why wasn't she with the team? Why is it so spectacular that she's coming back?

Ah well, moving on.

So, the now apparently reformed Ghostbusters power up their proton packs and start fighting some ghosts. From here, it's all zaps from the proton pack, ghost-punching, ghost-shredding.... Holtzmann even has this epic moment where she pulls out some "proton pistols" and starts blasting some ghosts, all with an awesome orchestration of the original Ghostbusters theme song. As I mentioned in my first review, this epic battle is a huge improvement over the simplistic final set piece from the first movie.

All of this leads back to the hotel where Rowan, still in Kevin's body, confronts them. He slips out of Kevin's body and decides to take a more "friendly" form. And no, it's not Stay-Puft like in the first movie; it's even sillier... It's the Ghostbusters logo, because that's literally the only thing they haven't referenced yet.

Yeah, that's another problem I have here. I feel like this movie is trying to treat Ghostbusters like it's one of the Marvel franchises and throw as many references in as possible while also being its own creation, and as a result, a lot of the references are very limited to random phrases and symbols that had very little significance to the franchise. Why? Because the franchise literally consists of two movies, a song, and a cartoon series, and even then, the movie's trying to pretend like the only thing out of those that existed was the first movie. I do believe that Ghostbusters can be an expanded universe, but somebody's going to have to CREATE that universe, because constantly paying homage to the first movie can only get you so far!

So, yeah, Rowan turns into the logo, he grows huge, and.... he does even less destruction than Stay-Puft in the first movie (at least he stepped on a church) before the team spots Slimer riding towards them with his new buddies and his girlfriend (yup, that just happened) and get the idea of tricking him into riding into the portal and zapping the top of the car to close the portal. They do so, only to find that Rowan is hanging on for his life, so as their final blow towards him to loosen his grip, they zap him in the crotch.

Yeah, I'll address the elephant in the room: Everyone's been treating this moment like Devestator's robotic testicles in Transformers 2, but honestly, this wasn't NEARLY on the same level as that. Devestator was set alongside racist twins, humping dogs, and a blender robot that had a gun for a penis. This film's been pretty standard comedy up to this point; fart jokes, slapstick, etc.; so it's less like "OH, THEY JUST ZAPPED HIM IN THE D***," so much as the standard crotch shot. So, yeah, loosen up, guys.

So, Rowan loses his grip and falls into the portal, but not before grabbing Abby and pulling her in with him. It's here that Erin snabs a firetruck tow line and jumps in after her, rescuing her, and getting pulled out by Holtzmann and Patty. After this, Kevin comes along and says he grabbed a sandwich while they were battling. (GOD, I LOVE THIS GUY!) The city dubs the Ghostbusters as heroes, and the mayor agrees to fund their cause from here on out, allowing them to have anything they want. "ANYTHING?!" So, they get the firehouse as their headquarters, and the movie wraps up.

After the movie's end credits, however, we get a reveal that could set up for the next film, as Patty's listening to a recording, and she hears something that makes her question: "What's Zuul?" DUN DUN DUUUUN!

So yeah, I know it sounds like I'm tearing this movie to shreds, but that's only because I talked about a lot of the positive stuff throughout my non-spoiler review. I did overall enjoy the movie, but it was essentially the little things that bothered me, and I'm hoping the people behind this film do a better job of creating a follow-up than the people behind the original..... That is, if they do decide to do a follow-up.

Thanks for reading this, and have a great day!