Friday, May 28, 2021

Cruella Movie Review

Who would have thought that Disney's attempt at Joker would turn out to be one of their more original products. Though technically a pseudo-prequel to its animated predecessor, Cruella is nevertheless part of Disney's long line of live-action reinterpretations of classic animated films, some of which have been well received, and some not so much. Does Craig Gillespie's attempt at a fashion driven psychopath break the mold?

My Quick Thoughts on the Other Live Action Disney Remakes
There are two remakes that I have enjoyed up until this point, and oddly enough, they're the ones that arguably stick the closest to the originals; Kenneth Branagh's Cinderella and Jon Favreau's Lion King. The rest, for me, can't seem to decide whether they want to be the originals or if they want to be their own thing. Jungle Book, for instance, is sort of a remake of the animated film but also sort of an adaptation of the book.... Sort of. On top of that, though, some of them try less to stay true to what made the originals classics and instead turn them into whatever's popular at the time, like turning Sleeping Beauty into Wicked, turning Mulan into a superhero, or turning Beauty and the Beast into a young adult story, right down to getting the director of Twilight. Speaking of directors, though, some of them have solid ideas for reinterpretations, but choose entirely wrong directors. The idea of bringing Aladdin to the modern age Bollywood style is a great idea, but Guy Ritchie has no experience with children's films or musicals, and yet he's brought on to direct a children's musical. The idea of Hook, but with Winnie the Pooh characters is clever, but Marc Foster is.... Well, Marc Foster.

To sum it up:
-If you're going to be different, be different
-Don't give into the latest fad
-Pick suitable directors

I bring all of that up because, thankfully, Cruella does all three of those things and more.

The Story
The film follows a girl with a passion for fashion named Estella, played by Emma Stone, who lost her mother and started a life as a thief at a young age. Years later, her two partners hook her up with an opportunity that leads her to a well acclaimed fashion icon known as The Baroness, played by Emma Thompson. However, as more and more secrets get revealed about her, Estella decides she wants to ruin her reputation by upstaging her under the alias Cruella.

What Doesn't Work About It

The Opening is Rushed
This is the exact same issue I had with the remake of Aladdin. The opening hits a ton of bullet points and takes little to no time to breathe. I thought this would be another remake dud when it first started, but luckily, that pacing only lasts in that opening.

Side note: Yes, I do think it's silly that the black and white hair is Estella's natural hair.

The Narrative is a Tad Crowded
The focus of the film primarily is the rivalry between Cruella and Baroness, but that rivalry does ultimately have a lot to unpack. The film goes from a heist to a montage of Cruella's shows to this big twist that ends in this final battle.... If the film just picked one of those things to focus on, it could have been something great.

Other Bits:
-There are a ton of CG animals that might be distracting for lovers of real animals
-Emma Stone's narration feels forced

What's Good About It
Emma Stone and Emma Thompson are Superb
These two nail their roles. Emma Stone makes the transition from girl who thinks she's a fashion genius but still wants to make her mom proud to cold, detached, ravishing Cruella smoothly. Emma Thompson makes for her perfect rival as well as someone to challenge Estella as she makes the transition.

The Film Has the Best Direction of All the Remakes
The whole film feels like a passion project, not something cold or calculated like most of the other remakes, but something that someone wanted to put together. It has a great sense of visual storytelling and just oozes in style.

Other Bits:
-The music is suitably old fashioned
-The other performances are serviceable

Where Should You See It? In Theaters
It took me a little bit to think about it, because there's not too much that would necessitate seeing it on the big screen, but there's nothing that just screams Disney+ either. My tipping point, however, is that this is the kind of remake I want to see get a big budget. The cold, calculated remakes similar to Aladdin or Beauty and the Beast can head down the Disney+ toilet, but original visions like this deserve the big screen treatment.

Overall Thoughts
Cruella is one of the better live action reinterpretations of classic Disney films. It's an unabashedly original vision with outstanding direction and phenomenal performances from Emma Stone and Emma Thompson. It has some narrative shortcomings, sure, but not enough to throw it completely off course. Don't miss this one, folks!

My Rating:

Sunday, May 2, 2021

Mortal Kombat (2021) Movie Review

Give them some credit, they did create the film equivalent of a fatality. Based on the popular fighting game franchise, Mortal Kombat is the second attempt at a film adaptation after the 1995 film received backlash for being a PG-13 version of an essentially M for Mature arcade game. Now, it's a hard R for the franchise, and people couldn't be more excited. With that said, will the gore help the film earn a flawless victory, or should you save your quarters? (I refer you to my opening line.)

My Thoughts on the Games
I can't say that I'm a huge follower of the games, so I don't know for sure how closely this movie or the previous movies follow them. I had the Super Nintendo game growing up (which was the version without the blood, mind you), and it was a decent fighting game to pick up and play every once in a while. It had a wide variety of characters with a wide variety of abilities.

My Thoughts on the Previous Movies
At a time when Yoshi was a velociraptor and Guile from Street Fighter was foreign, it was easy to see why this 1995 adaptation was considered the highlight of video game movies, simply because it was the first one to actually look like the games..... But I'm not sure if that alone makes it a good movie. By staying true to the cookie cutter characters that players could easily understand as they're quickly trying to select characters to fight with, the result was.... Well, cookie cutter characters. Besides that, the fight scenes, without the intense gore that the games were famous for, mostly came off as generic martial arts stunt work. It did its job and nothing else.... Which is more than I can say for its laughably abysmal sequel.

Now, on to the actual movie.
The Story
The film follows Cole Young, the descendant of Hanzo Hasashi (aka Scorpion), whose family held the reputation of representing Earthrealm and defeating Outworld in a tournament known as Mortal Kombat. He, along with Sonya Blade, a conspiracy theorist who's been researching the tournament all her life, her friend Jax, and an assassin named Kano, are being hunted down by Outworld's assassin named Bi-Han (aka Sub-Zero) until they retreat to a temple with the elder god, Rayden, to each unlock their "arcana" to defeat Bi-Han, along with his leader, Shang Tsung, and the rest of his assassins.

What's Good About It

The Blood Level is Through the Roof
Like I said earlier, I played the Super Nintendo version of Mortal Kombat growing up, so I didn't think too deeply about the lack of blood in the 1995 film, but if that's your biggest concern, you shan't worry here. This is not only a hard R, it's a creatively hard R. There's hearts ripping out, guts spilling everywhere.... There's enough blood here to fill a pool!

Other Bits:
-The action is well choreographed
-The few moments where the Mortal Kombat theme is played are awesome
-The effects are better

What Doesn't Work About It
The Story is Overly Complicated
Thanks to this film, this is one thing I learned to appreciate about the 95 movie. As cookie cutter as its characters are, the story was straight forward: Three talented fighters were selected to compete in a tournament. This one throws in conspiracy theories, backstories, training segments.... In the 95 movie, they were already skilled, but here, they try to squeeze in this idea of finding their "arcana;" nothing inherently wrong with that, but it leaves little to no room for the fighting, and when they do get to the actual tournament, it comes out of nowhere and catches you off guard.

Kano is Mind-Numbingly Annoying
At first, I liked Kano's sarcastic tone and witty remarks, and I thought he was going to be the energy that carried this movie to the end, and that's definitely what they go for. However, after hearing that exaggeration for about twenty minutes, it overstayed its welcome and I was just about ready to scream "SHUT UP!"

Other Bits:
-The non-theme music is forgettable
-The action is repetitive
-The characters are also cookie cutter here

Where Should I See It? HBOMax
I saw this movie in a Cinemark XD theater, and I don't feel like the theater experience enhanced it at all. It had very few larger-than-life moments (the above picture being the only one I can think of), and it comes off more like the kind of movie that you'd watch at a house party. I could just see a bunch of guy friends shouting "OHHHHH MAAAAAN" at the gory moments.

Final Thoughts
Mortal Kombat is easily the weakest video game movie to come out in the past two years. It was nice of the producers to give us an R-Rated gorefest after the PG-13 snorefest, but by running wild with that gimmick, it forgot the most essential parts of a solid script: a simple story and interesting characters. If the gore and action alone do it for you, power to ya, but for me, this one just eats up my quarters.

My rating:

Friday, April 2, 2021

Godzilla vs Kong Movie Review

Because the title Clash of the Titans was already taken..... Godzilla vs Kong is the latest entry in the only multiple movie universe to succeed besides Marvel, the Monsterverse. I'll admit, I'm slightly shocked at the hype behind this movie, given that the previous entry, Godzilla: King of the Monsters, was considered a box office disappointment, and also considering that monster movies have been more popular overseas than here in the US. However, when the trailer hit for this, people went crazy; all over Twitter, you saw either #TeamKong or #TeamGodzilla. With that said, does the movie live up to such hype?

Quick Thoughts on the Other Monsterverse Movies

Godzilla (2014): A clever way to bring Godzilla into the modern times via making it play out like a disaster movie. Godzilla looks great, and Bryan Cranston's performance and character were great. The only thing I didn't care for was Aaron Taylor Johnson's character.

Kong Skull Island: Somewhat of an insult in that it turns one of the Golden Age Cinema classics into a dumb monster movie, but as far as dumb monster movies go, I had a blast!

Godzilla: King of the Monsters: Spectacular momster movie and amazing IMAX experience, despite some increasingly dumb human characters.

Okay, on to our main attraction! 

The Story
Godzilla is attacking various Apex Cybernetics locations around the world for unknown reasons. Monarch, the organization from the other movies that specializes in the different titans, retaliates by getting Kong to go after a great source of power and using it to defeat Godzilla. Meanwhile, Maddie, the girl from King of the Monsters, tracks down a podcaster that's been researching the titans and gets him to help them find out why Godzilla is acting so wild in the first place.

What's Good About It
The Fight Scenes are Amazing
Let me just get that out of the way to calm your curiosity. Every time Godzilla and Kong duke it out is a warehouse of joy. It's well shot, the moves have a ton of variety, and the passion the two have just leaps off the screen.

The Human Characters are Suitably Simple
I was worried going in about what they were going to do with the humans, if they were going to be too distracting or melodramatic, but what they did with them surprisingly works. They don't get bogged down with backstory or family drama; some humans are there to get Kong where he needs to go, others try to figure out what's going on with Godzilla. Simple, focused, perfect.

Other Bits:
-The music is awesome
-Kong has a few heartfelt moments
-There's another villain monster that was a pleasant surprise

What Doesn't Work About It
The CGI is Distractingly Fake
Not that CG has exactly had a breakthrough in recent years, but this is easily the most cartoony looking CGI the Monsterverse has had. Godzilla in particular always looked bulky and massive in the previous movies, and here, he looks more flimsy and spongy.

Other bits:
-It felt a little short (though I guess "I wanted more" is a good complaint)

Where Should I See It? IMAX
This is one of the better IMAX experiences I've had. Every time Godzilla or Kong roar or drop to the ground and I feel my seat shake, I'm reminded of why I still love going to the theater.

Overall Thoughts
Godzilla vs Kong is just as fun and riveting as the title sounds. The action is amazing, the music is outstanding, and the IMAX is definitely worth the premium. If this peaks your interest even in the slightest, definitely check it out.

My rating:

Friday, March 19, 2021

Zack Snyder's Justice League Movie Review

Looks like Zack finally served Warner Brothers their JUST desserts, eh? Originally released in 2017, Justice League was helmed initially by Zack Snyder, who also directed Man of Steel in 2013 and Batman v Superman in 2015. After a tragic loss in his family, however, the directing role was handed over to Joss Whedon. The result was as convoluted as it sounds, and the massive reshoots and revamp of special effects needed caused the film's cost to skyrocket, which caused the film to bomb despite making a typically reasonable amount. So, despite the constant demand from fans for Snyder to return and bring his vision to life, such a project didn't seem too reasonable for Warner Brothers..... Until now. How does it hold up? Let's take a look! 

Quick Mini-Review on Original Cut
When I first saw Justice League in theaters, I enjoyed it enough mostly because it gave colorful visuals and some fun action. Even back then, though, I kept telling myself that it's good, but that this team up of gods shouldn't just be "good;" it should be great. I mean, this isn't The Defenders, it's the Justice League! It's a team of gods! This should be the most amazing, grand, epic, incredible superhero movie ever! And it wasn't. It was a decent flick that I keep forgetting even exists.

Not to spoil too much about this review, but I'm going to have a hard time forgetting this Snyder Cut exists.

The Story
Thousands of years ago, a dark being known as Darkseid attempted to conquer our planet using three Motherboxes that, when combined, would destroy the Earth and turn all life on the planet into his slaves. After an epic battle against his minions, however, the boxes were kept separate and protected, and they remained dormant until an event from Batman v Superman caused them to wake up. Bruce Wayne and Diana Prince, both being aware of this, set out on a quest to find other metahumans like them to fight the battle they now anticipate.

What's Good About It
The Characters are much more fleshed out
Those who keep thinking that a team-up movie doesn't need to have each character star in their own movie beforehand needs to consider the fact that the version of this movie that actually made the characters more interesting is a 4-hour cut. In the theatrical cut, Cyborg and Flash's backstories are reduced to their quickest explanations and then they're thrown into quips and action scenes, but here, you get to see emotional prologues and establishments of their motivations. They set up background, they pursue their goals (all of which ties into the main story, mind you), and there's payoff by the end. It's not just one liners and punches, it's emotional storytelling.

Steppenwolf is Shockingly Intimidating
One of my biggest issues with the theatrical cut is that the villain, Steppenwolf, is the most bland, generic, nothing villain. Here, I don't know if it's the redesign or the execution or both, but he is much more Intimidating here. He comes off less like a bland speech giver and more like an alien horror monster, one who can't be reasoned with, can't be stopped, and can't be easily beaten. Part of that might be because we see the heroes do everything in their power to stop him from obtaining the Motherboxes, whereas I feel like much of the back-and-forth conflict is trimmed to nothing in the theatrical cut.

The Length Benefits Its Ambitions
I don't know if this is an unpopular opinion or not, but the length actually made the film come off as more epic to me. The theatrical cut trimmed the film down to the same length as any other run-of-the-mill superhero film, and that's what it turned out to be. This is a superhero epic, and thanks to the length, I can say that in every sense of the word. It's the Lawrence of Arabia or Lord of the Rings of superhero flicks, and it feels like such and it runs as long as such.

Other bits:
-The color scheme looks more genuine
-The Flash is treated with tons more honor in the climax

What Doesn't Work About It

It's a Zack Snyder Film
This really isn't an issue for me, as Zack Snyder is a great director in my eyes, but let's be fair, he's not going to win everyone over. If you're not a fan of Snyder's color scheme, fake looking effects, emo-ish soundtrack, or dramatic choirs, this will be a waste of four hours for you. If you're not a fan of how he portrays the characters, this isn't going to change anything for you. None of that bothers me, but if it bothers you, it will still bother you.

Overall Thoughts
Zack Snyder's Justice League is exactly what I wanted from the theatrical cut; it's big, it's epic, it's ambitious, it's emotional, and it expands the universe to a point where I would want to see more from it! I greatly appreciate Zack's hard work at bringing it to life, and I greatly appreciate the studio for giving him the time and resources to put it together! This is a must see for any fan of superhero films!

My rating:

Sunday, March 7, 2021

Raya and the Last Dragon Movie Review by C.M. Waters

I don't have too much to say except... Boy howdy, does it feel good to get excited about movies again. Raya and the Last Dragon is Disney's latest solo animation effort and the (co-)directorial debut of Paul Briggs, known for working on the stories for Wreck It Ralph and Zootopia. It appears on the surface to be Disney's attempt to hop on the bandwagon of anime fandom as well as continue their attempts at expanding into worldly cultures as Pixar has helped them do with films like Coco and the upcoming Luca. But does this film succeed at that, or did Disney overreach their grasp? Let's take a look!

THE STORY
The film's prologue explains that the land of Kumandra used to be a peaceful, harmonious land until the Druun, an evil, blobby spirit, attacked the land and turned all the people and dragons of the land into stone. It wasn't until Sisu, the last dragon, used her powers (or so the legend said) to create an orb to ward off the Druun and bring all the people (but not the dragons) back to life. The land was divided over the demand of power over the orb, but 500 years later, Benja, the leader of the land of Heart, attempts to bring the lands together and, as he puts it, become Kumandra once more. Sadly, though, one member of the Fang tribe attempts to steal the sacred orb, causing it to break into pieces, causing the Druun to rise up once again, and each tribe gets away with a piece of the orb. Six years after this, Raya manages to summon Sisu only to find out that she never created the orb, but if they can journey to each land and gather up the pieces of the orb, she can fuse them back together to get rid of the Druun once and for all.

Okay, I'm going to go slightly out of order on this, because what I'm about to say transitions better into.....

WHAT DOESN'T WORK ABOUT IT

The Plot Has Way Too Much Material for a Movie
This was obviously Disney's attempt to replicate the success of Nickelodeon's Avatar: The Last Airbender, and while it doesn't cram nearly as much material as M. Night Shyamalan's disastrous live action adaptation, it still leaves the movie with a ton to work with. It leaves just enough room for the emotional impact to happen, but not really enough room for that moment to sink in. It's like, "Here's an emotional moment. Great! Next scene!" The story may have worked better as a TV series or even a Disney+ series. As a movie, it squeezes too much material into one two-hour running time.

Sisu is Not Funny
The dragon, Sisu, played by Awkwafina (more like, Awkward-fina), is clearly the film's attempt to continue the success of comedic side characters to offset the emotions of the main character, and on a scale of said characters, she's not as annoying as the gargoyles from Hunchback of Notre Dame, but she's no Mushu either. She makes references to modern day like referring to herself as that one student who never did work on a group project but got the same grade as everyone else... What? I mean, I guess they would have school in this world, but... I don't know, that sounds too much like the Genie from Aladdin, which makes no sense in the context of this world.

The Tone Gets to be Jarring
As many people have mentioned, the tone is inconsistent as the film goes on. What surprised me, though, is that people were saying that it started with a serious tone and sprinkled too much comedy throughout, but for me, it was the other way around. When the film started, I thought it had the perfect style to combine drama with comedy, so the constant witty dialogue didn't bother me. Then, we reach the third act, and the film takes a drastic dive into seriousness that threw me for a loop. I don't want to give too much away, but it gets intense fast.

WHAT'S GOOD ABOUT IT
Raya is a Unique Female Lead
I don't know about the rest of the world, but I was getting tired of the female lead getting degraded in Disney films like Mulan and Moana. Here, however, Raya's father entrusts her with the responsibility of protecting the orb, and Disney actually had the courage to let her fail at it and face the consequences of failing at her responsibility. Props to you, Disney. Props.

The Story is Emotionally Impactful
Even though, like I said, the plot does throw a ton at the audience, the story does still get across its emotions. You feel the connections between the characters, you feel their struggle as they try to figure out what's best for the sake of the entire world. When it wants to be sad, it can be sad. When it wants to be hopeful, it can be hopeful. And when it wants to be funny, aside from Sisu's scenes, it can be really funny; I enjoyed the baby thief in this much more than most people.

The Action is Excellently Choreographed
Every action scene looks like it's straight out of an old kung fu movie. It's new territory for Disney, but they did a fantastic job with it. In fact, why don't we see more animated action movies? It's an environment that you can manipulate every aspect of; there's so much potential!


OVERALL THOUGHTS
Raya and the Last Dragon is parts Avatar: The Last Airbender and parts Raiders of the Lost Ark, which makes it a ton of fun for the whole family. It's a little too overstuffed and tonally jarring to be on the same level as something like Frozen or Lion King, but it's still a fun flick, and the kids will most likely love it.

My rating:

Thursday, March 4, 2021

The Spongebob SquarePants Movie: Sponge on the Run Movie Review by C.M. Waters

Fun fact: When a pineapple stays underwater for over twenty years, it molds into an ugly abomination. Sponge on the Run is the third theatrical release in Nickelodeon's global phenomenon and, despite coming out so late in the game, was one of the earliest 2020 movies to get pulled from a theatrical release (at least in the US) and get saved for a streaming release, which is what I witnessed tonight. Frankly, the trailers didn't exactly catch my eye, and if I were to have watched the film, I most likely would have saved it for streaming anyway, but I didn't expect the ugly abomination, the downright garbage-induced imsult to one of my childhood icons, that I got.


THE STORY
Big shocker: Plankton is after the Krabby Patty secret formula. (Yeah, we'll talk about that in a bit.) This time, however, he realizes that Spongebob is the reason why he never gets the formula, so when King Posideon sends out a decree for all snails in the sea to be sent to him, he kidnaps Gary and sends him over, forcing Spongebob to go on a big adventure to the "lost" city of Atlantis to rescue him.

WHAT'S GOOD ABOUT IT
Just so you know, this time around, I'm scraping at the bottom of the barrel for these bits....

Posideon and His Minions are Amusing
This was the closest that the movie ever got to being funny for me. King Posideon and his assistant reminded me a lot of King Louie and his assistant from Disney's Robin Hood. They were charismatic and easily the most reserved of the characters.

Other Bits:
-The color scheme is okay
-Young Spongebob is cute on the eyes
-The Patty Wagon gets awesome upgrades

WHAT DOESN'T WORK ABOUT IT
The Plot Makes No Sense
Spongebob's first movie, for any problems it may have had, at least kept a consistent, focused plot flowing. However, it seems that the series transcends into further nonsense with each entry, and sorry to say, this is the pinnacle of that. The city of Atlantis is hyped up to be a city of death and mayhem, someplace no one is ever to go, and then it's presented as a tourist attraction. Like, what? But it gets worse than that; there's a scene where Spongebob and Patrick randomly pull up to a saloon in a Western town (no Rango cameo, mind you), and they come across ghost pirate cowboy zombies that have their own dance number. I had to check to make sure I wasn't baked after that.

Plankton is a Villain..... AGAIN.....
I am sick of this..... Can you imagine if every Batman movie had Joker as the villain, or if every Spider-Man movie had Green Goblin as the villain? I mean, come on, does every Spongebob movie need to be about Plankton getting the Krabby Patty formula? Come on, the Flying Dutchman, Bubble Bass, Squilliam.... It was fun seeing Plankton as the bad guy in the first movie, but throw in some variety, would ya? What's worse, though, is that I guess because of the recent success of films like 2019's Joker, they try to make Plankton a SYMPATHETIC villain, and his attempt to win our hearts comes right out of nowhere and has no buildup to it.

The Movie is Not Funny.... At All
As demonstrated by the oh-so-(not-)brilliant "sense of irony" joke in the trailer, most if not all of the jokes in this movie are bottom of the barrel garbage. There's a few jokes that made me laugh, but for the most part, it just shows how much the series has used up every bit of steam it has. This time, however, the animation tries drastically to make up for its lack of well written humor by exaggerating the animation in a desperate attempt for amusement, and it DOES NOT WORK AT ALL. There's an entire minute long scene at the beginning where Spongebob and Patrick just repeatedly say good morning to each other. It's painful.

Speaking of the animation, though, let's get to my absolute biggest problem with the movie....

The Animation is Ugly
These characters were not designed to be CG characters, and this ugly monstrosity demonstrates why. The 2D animation looked gorgeous because it was simple designs that gave the characters a charming, accessible look. Here, every character has their textures filled out to the tee, and it's just hideous to see every little pore on Spongebob, every bump on Squidward, and every strand of fur on Sandy..... GOOD GOD, DOES SANDY LOOK HIDEOUS IN THIS....

Other Bits:
-Tiffany Haddish is barely in this
-Keanu Reaves doesn't add too much
-The soundtrack has too many modern songs thrown in
-Are we just ignoring King Neptune? (And other continuity errors)


OVERALL THOUGHTS
Sponge on the Run takes the Spongebob I grew up with, throws it on the ground, and stomps it into the dust. It's ugly to look at, painfully unfunny, and overly exaggerated, unlike the gorgeously animated and ridiculously funny show and first movie that relied less on the animation and more on the clever writing to get its laughs. I'm glad I saved this for streaming, because if I had to look at this ugliness on the big screen, I probably wouldn't have lasted ten minutes.

My Rating: